Elvish Foreskin-Stretching Techniques

The following causes even the guy who wrote it as a joke to lose sleep at night, please reconsider reading if you don't enjoy horrible jokes about cock n' ball torture.

Here, you can see the incredibly detailed account of a human explorer's account of a sacred and beautiful cultural tradition.

Original text/copypasta
among the elves of ahlman, a bizarre practice can be observed. It can usually be characterized by the tying of males to large, metal frames to restrain them while hooks are attached to the foreskin. these hooks are then attached to ropes, which are pulled by females in traditional leather bikini-style armor for about 12 hours a day. It is thought that this is a sort of rite of passage into manhood, with most successful male elves having a foreskin around 3 feet in length. even longer are the foreskins of elvish warriors, who use them as a sort of carrying sack. In fact, there are stories of fronjish soldiers being strangled to death with elvish stealth-soldier's foreskins. while warriors and common men have much larger foreskins than the average human male could ever dream of, the elvish high king sIth haazimakh has a foreskin theorized to be over 15 feet in length. This is much to the joy of his incredibly voluptuous wife, who writes detailed descriptions of their various sexual positions involving sIth's foreskin, which are seen as incredibly important cultural works by the elves.

As shown by queen luh'na haazimakh, elvish foreskins are seen as incredibly attractive by females of the species, so much that and elvish male's chance of reproducing is determined by how long his foreskin is.